A
Step By Step Guide With Former Evil Genius Captain Electro
What about your evil demonic laugh? For many would-be Captains of Evil
perfecting a deep throaty laugh is an essential part of the repertoire
of nefariousity. Your evil laugh tells the world, quivering at your feet,
that you are in control, you are the master, and all plans for Truth and
Justice have come to nought.
Although
no longer essential, it's a good idea to develop a good laugh--just in
case you may need it. It lends an air of nigh-insanity that may undermine
the confidence of world leaders or super-buffoons. In my years as the
World's Number One Evil Villain I won several awards for my evil laugh,
a laugh that rocked the United World Headquarters, and still would, if
it weren't for those dundering twins and their pathetic little monkey.
I'm Frank
Herschel, but you can call me Captain Electro. Don't worry, I'm retired,
and only interested in providing you with the encouragement to
take over the world!
There are
several formal qualities of the laugh itself that should be examined.
Timbre and tone are important. Use your whole chest as a resonating chamber,
not just the upper part of your lungs. Remember, you want a deep, wholesome
chortle, punctuated by carefully timed breaks between the bursts of guffaw.
Nothing says "I have control" over your city of choice like
a profound guffaw, filled with derision and scorn at the feebleness of
your crushed, or soon-to-be-crushed opponents.
Lung power
is essential to develop your laugh. Practice breathing from the bottom
of your stomach. No, the bottom you fool! Screaming at your minions
for hours on end will also strenghten your vocal chords. When the time
calls for an evil laugh you'll want to be able to go on for what will
seem like an eternity. The Crimson Spackler was able to laugh for close
to half an hour when he had the Ultra Sigma Ray pointed at Jocosity City's
City Hall--and he could have gone on longer if that puny doer of good
Ptarmigan Boy hadn't sneaked up behind him with the Grouse Gun.
Some supervillains
have experimented with with a nasal cackle. For this to work properly
you need hunched shoulders, squinting eyes and wringing hands. Unfortunately,
this formula runs the risk of not being taken seriously. The last thing
you want is for superheros, civic officials, or even your own minions
laughing at you. I hate it when that happens. The hearty laugh, accompanied
by a scornful smirk or sneer is a safer bet when you're just starting
out.
In the last
ten or fifteen years some villains have eschewed the demonic evil laugh,
believing it to be "old-school". Going for a more subtle behind-the-scenes
approach these new super bad guys don't even wear colourful costumes and
are hard to distinguish from their own minions and slaves!
Although
their organizational skills are impressive, they are hardly likely to
strike terror and fear into the hearts of the masses with their shallow
and simpering chortles and giggles. Develop your own evil laugh to resonate
off the walls of buildings and you will soon have the entire world on
their knees!
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